Legality ≠ Morality

(or listen here)

Nothing pithy to say about that.

Legality does not define morality.
A reminder that at one time 
it was legal to enslave people, but it was never moral
it was legal to deny women the right to vote, but it was never moral
it was legal to rape your wife, but it was never moral
it was legal to torture people out of their love interests, but it was never moral
it was legal to rape children, but it was never moral

Denying people basic food/water/housing/clothing/comprehensive healthcare/humane dignity is amoral in any and every situation


In other news, I reinvigorated clean-out mode and dropped off more things to the peoples and the Goodwill. I know there are controversial feelings about the Goodwill, but that is where I went to bequeath the things to their new life elsewhere. As I waited my turn for drop off, I started the Instagram search scroll. Bad choices. I cried – not full-on, just the trickling kind. As I was scrolling, I thought about why I was doing that instead of just waiting the few minutes for my turn. And why is it that suddenly I was able to load things into the car and drop them off after they had been sitting around for probably a year? Then it hit me. I am back into we-might-be-murdered mode. Clean up and out so there isn’t too much of a mess for everyone else, just in case. Which is nonsense because who even knows what the situation really is? I certainly do not.

then the loneliness sinks in

then I have to get to school to wait in carline for SonHerisme. I have not told him about his father’s move. I cannot do it. Yet, I know this is a “yet.”

I gathered up my sweet tiny newborn giant baby bear teenager person. I completed the pumpkin carving and storm preparations for today. We had more vege chili and sushi (because we did the awkward combo dinner). We watched Glee. I explained “happy ending,” “celibacy,” “under-the-shirt-over-the-bra,” “premature ejaculation,” Salt ‘n Pepa’s “Push It,” and, as always, wrapping up with a generous dose of what “consent,” means… again. An evening of single mommy to teen boy conversations. I hope SonHerisme has a hefty therapy budget for his adult times and pre-apologies to his future partners for anything I may be or have been completely screwing up.

Tonight is Monopoly, pizza, movie (SonHerisme’s choice) night. One time a sweet friend asked me if I could choose any movie to watch just for myself, what that movie might be. I couldn’t answer. There are a million and none. None because I think if I had the wherewithal to choose my own thing to do for two plus hours, I am not sure that I would choose a movie. Or perhaps I would – I have no idea. How about you?

I send out comfort to all of you struggling parents and struggling humans. I also send some to non-strugglers to bank for as needed.

Love, Ms. Herisme xoxo

some of my favorite movies are Philadelphia Story, Mindwalk, His Girl Friday, Holiday Inn, Bringing Up Baby, Best in Show, Princess Bride, Much Ado About Nothing, Sense & Sensibility, and a zillion others I cannot think of at the moment. For a long time I would only watch films in other languages so that I could just enjoy the cinematography and sounds without the verbal nuances of the storytelling. That’s how I roll tootsie roll.

(Photo by Anna Shvets on

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s