Straight Buggin’

(Imperfect Colorful Life)
(or listen here)

There are a zillion little life reminders around right now as the seasons push for the final changeover from quiet sloshity cold Winter to zippy buzzy growy mowy movin’ grovin’ Spring!

Carpenter bees buzz around my al fresco lunch to say, “howdeedo,” and prepare me for their upcoming territorial arguments.

Giant ants tippy tapped across the floor emboldened by the weather and smell of puppy food to explore new areas of abundance for their colony.

Carpet beetle made it’s shiny patent presence known by traipsing across my eyelid while I rested(ugh).

Wolf spider creepy crawled around the bathtub thoroughly confused by it’s slippery trapped predicament (I rescued it bc spiders are helpers).

Wasps, determined to build waspy dwellings in places that do not work for this human, become bewildered and enraged when their hard work is once again displaced (by me).

Chipmunk family is reorganizing itself for better protection from black snake family by moving up the hill a bit underneath a different clump of rocks and thorn bushes.

Salamander, displaced by deck furniture rearrangement, is wriggling around the edge of the moist mossy rocky path.

Bumble bee is very extroverted and wants to follow us around like a little happy puppy when we walk outside.

Barred owl hoot boot hoots the Bat signal that it is time to twitter flitter out and about.

Honey bee is more interested in finding the tasty bits and remaining unencumbered by any socialization expectation while questing (or they will sting – yikes!)

Hawk is laughing with buddies while circling and practicing hunting swoops.

Mourning Doves are hooting their gentle sounds of soul love tinged with sadness knowing its depth but also brevity.

Blue Jay is blue jaying up the place screaming and being very yelly loud.

Butterfly is fluttering this way and that way to avoid the wasps but also enjoy the lilac bush too (the extra large creepy wasps nest there).

Squirrel is relaxed, waiting for things to ripen, knowing that they do not need to worry about food for another season.

Bobcat is staying hidden, only leaving bits of evidence that a meal has been somewhat enjoyed, interrupted, then returned for clean up. Because they are very precise with how they kill and eat, you know they’ve visited.

Deer is birthing the fawns and I expect we will see some deposited in the front woods for safety while mommy eats all day. Occasionally there are twins!

Turkey is gobbling, running and short-burst flying up and down the rocky hillside, protecting babies and avoiding the foxes.

Crow is hanging with the murder doing the caw-caw things.

Black bear has wandered farther up the mountains because 6 new homes in the area have displaced their family.

Rabbit is hippity hopping from one protected area to another, hiding babies in soft deep grasses.

Skunk is bumbling about, drunk on skunk life things and absorbed in its own skunk thinking world.

Fantastic Mr. Fox is prowling about by the fields, avoiding Boggis, Bunce and Beans for sure, yet always finding tasty morsels of a little something here and there, plus libation to wash it all down nicely while waiting for Mr. Jeremy Fisher (in his waistcoat).

I hope that you are finding some interesting observations in your springtime.

Love, Ms. Herisme xoxo

When SonHerisme was a smaller human riding in the back seat in his sweet blue booster carseat, I would point out into one of the large fields we passed on our way home from some adventurous excursion and say:

"Look out there!  Do you see a giraffe(or lion, elephant, whatever animal we surely would not see out there)?!?"  
SonHerisme would look this way and that way, "No, I don't see it, Momma."  
"Me either, baby puffin bear.  I guess we'll keep looking for other things." 

"Look over there!  Do you see the goats?!?"
So excited, SonHerisme would say, "I do! I do, Momma!  I do see the goats!!!"
"Me too, sweet bear, me too."

ps. I would also ask him crazy questions on the way home from school:

Did the elephants come to school that day so that they could learn about how to care for elephants and keep an elephant healthy and safe?
Was he able to help the lost group of magicians find their way back to magician school?
Did the parade people come and ask their help to get the floats ready for the big parade?
What did he get to do to help with the zebra train that was taking the zebras back to their homes? 
How did he help save the school from all those pirates running around?
And if none of this happened at school that day, wasn't he bored and what was the point of going to school?

Holy shitballs y’all, that kid is going to need therapy. Straight Buggin’

Also – what a fucking relief to leisurely review what our president said to congress last night. In honor of that and International Dance Day, enjoy this!

Not Knot

Who’s there?

Me

Me who?

That’s right!

Do you remember that Shel Silverstein poem about the Mehoo?

I know that the image is difficult to read. If you click on the link you’ll see some of his work. If I add an audio to this blog, I’ll read it for you. Anywho, I like the door image and I like the poem. I do not know Mr Silverstein and he is dead so I will never know him, other than what I imagine him to be through his work. He must have been funny and enjoyed loose clothing so that he could belly laugh a lot, n’est-ce pas? If you have read anything about him which does not match this description, kindly keep it to yourself and permit me to have this image of him, please and thank you and bless you and may the force be with you, this is the way.

The barn-ish door is also lovely. I would very much like to be worthy of having a barn door. I’m not. However, every week at riding lessons I have an opportunity to open the big real-life barn door to the indoor arena as the riders walk their sweet horses up to the indoor ring. It is gigantically huge, heavy, metal, and sometimes stuck in squishy squashy mud. I find it a personal win when I can open and close the door on my own. It’s the little things. Truly. This and my imagination are all I have. Well, that is a lie – SonHerisme is here too xo and I do have some irl friends (it’s true!).

I also have my hair. A lot of hair. It’s fine, but there is a lot of it and it is primarily unruly with tangles. I gave up on it years ago and now mostly tie it in knots on top of my head. It’s so weirdly straight/curly/wavy/red/brown/blonde/now some white/gray that I do not need any hair-ties or pins. I wind the hair around and around and tie it onto itself giving the appearance of intention, which is instead more laissez faire- ish function. Rare hair trims outside of me diy youtubing it, because I cannot be bothered with fixing it just so, using product/tools, or even brushing it. Unfortunately it is also quite tangley and I am tender-headed, so I try to brush it out at least every-other day, but it is a time and arm/shoulder/neck muscles commitment. I’m afraid to like it too much because then it will surely fall out or change texture or color in a way that makes me hate it. It’s my trauma showing again – ta daaa!

Why share?

1. I am trying to write regularly (again)

2. I am trying to break the spell of anytime I like something about myself it tends to implode

3. I need to be doing something creative

4. Perhaps you will feel less crazy and alone when you read my posts (and maybe giggle)

There’s always one friend in the friendgroup who appears nice enough, but slightly (or mostly?) odd. Then you find out their backstory and its all out cuckoo crazy cats to the point of unbelievable. Every time you see them there is always some new unlocked level of crazy swirling around them, and it is isn’t ever the OMG THAT is crazy AWESOME, crazy – it’s the holy shitballs wtf is she doing to attract all of that crap, crazy? (psst…. it’s me… boo!)

Once upon a pre-covid time, I was at a friend’s dinner party (very casual, very relaxed, very much a regular part of our friendgroup routine, very much always included piles of kids happily running around with sticks and mud and giggles – *sigh* I miss pre-covid and my sweet babe) – I was at a friend’s house with a merry mix of people I knew, people I sort-of knew, and people I did not know. Some of the adults gathered in the kitchen to enjoy adult beverages and conversation, when one of the women began talking about her brother re-entering online dating. As she was describing the “crazy women” he was meeting online, it hit me that I was the ONLY single person at this dinner party and my personal situation was even wackier than the women she was describing. I was/am the crazy. That shit that was sobering. I left the room and wandered with the kids outside for a bit (flashlight headbands in the woods y’all – it was glorious!), then did the koyc hug round and left.

Things that have changed since that dinner party

  1. My baby SonHerisme is now a giant
  2. MrexH is not within driving distance of us
  3. I am noticeably older (white curls peeking, lady fronts drooping, yo)
  4. COVID shut the everythings
  5. My personal boundaries are more firm
  6. I am mostly a Mehoo Pooh with frequent Eeyore rising and knots of hair on my head

How are you?

Love, Ms. Herisme xoxo

koyc = Kiss On Your Cheek (shamelessly lifted from an old entanglement)

ps. Like you, I continue to be horrified at the way we allow racism, white supremacy, and white male rage to go unchecked. Please check in with your neighbors. Fighting racism and violence is the responsibility of us all – especially those of us who ride the coattails of our whiteness. Please reach out, check in on your neighbors, and draw firm boundaries with racist behaviors. We are not okay without accountability.